Monday, 4 March 2013

Saying Goodbye and Moving On

On Saturday, my DH and I did a little ritual for the baby we lost two and a half weeks ago.  We walked onto our local heath, each taking something with us.  He took a flower from our garden, I took a little package I'd put together in red tissue paper, with some of my own blood and hair.  This is one of those instances where I am perfectly happy to do "blood magic", as I mentioned on a youtube video last year.  After all, this baby was "blood of my blood, flesh of my flesh" and I wanted to honour that, as we didn't have a body to bury.

We walked until we found a tree that spoke to us, then silently asked the tree's permission before burying our offerings at its roots.  It was moving and healing, and we cried and hugged, and then spent some time walking on the heath, reconnecting with life - our own bodies in movement, and the earth that is still dark from winter, but with small hints of the spring to come.

On Sunday, I drew these three cards from the Mystical Kipper (Königsfurt-Urania, 2007):

Fiechter & Trösch
The first card is the "Marriage Status Card", which can show what a relationship is like by its position in relation to the people cards in a Grand Tableau.  However, a little like the Ring in the Lenormand, it also represents commitments, ties and contracts.  The card next to it is the "Small Child" card, and the child has its back to the first card.  So, this is a commitment, a responsibility which is now in the past.  That chimes well with our having done the ceremony to release the spirit of our unborn child.

Moving forward, what we have is a "Judicial person".  While this can indicate some sort of legal situation - a court case, a job for a solicitor, and so on - it also has echoes of the Justice card in tarot.  I read it as saying that moving on means taking some time to assess the situation dispassionately.  I notice, too, the little gnome on the judge's shoulder.  Perhaps a need to listen to spirit in this...  And the peacock outside the courthouse shows that it's time to look for the beauty in life outside of this situation.  As my reading last week said, it's time to re-find my joy in life, and maybe that will also help me decide how to move forward more dispassionately, no longer so stuck in the sad and bad feelings!

6 comments:

  1. moving forward is sometimes hard to do, I know. Hopefully the coming of the spring and return to the light will help. You have a lovely blog, very insightful, many blessings, Alison xx
    http://www.astartemoonblog.com/

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    1. Thanks, Alison, glad to hear you like the blog. Yours is lovely, too, I'll add it to my bloglist :) As you say, the season itself will help a little...

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  2. This makes me very sad reading it, and yet I know how important and healthy it was to make this ritual. I really admire that, and you.

    Lots of love and healing,
    MM

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    1. Thanks, MM, love and healing are always welcome! It was good to do the ritual. I'm still not sure where we go next, but it feels like we've at least started the process of releasing.

      Blessings to you,
      K

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  3. What a beautiful and healing ritual. Hugs and blessings.

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    1. Thanks, Carla, I was glad that we did it together :)
      Hugs and blessings to you, too!

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