Friday, 6 September 2013

Letting Go

This morning, I was planning to pull an oracle card, but then I ended up pulling out and shuffling my favourite Lenormand deck.  A card fell out, and without looking at it I took it as a theme.  Then, five more fell out all together, and I chose to take them as the main reading.  Finally, I looked to the base card, and took that as the guidance/lesson card.  I laid them out as a cross for myself, but when I scanned these cards from the Mystical Lenormand (Königsfurt-Urania, 2004) they wouldn't fit on my scanner that way, so we get the pattern you see here.  The Coffin is the theme card, and the Cross is the guidance card.

Coffin & Cross; Birds, Child, Tree, Ship, Clouds.
This fits very well with yesterday's New Moon reading, and a comment Ellen left.  It's been such a bumpy journey getting to this point, with a baby hopefully on the way, but a lot of fear in my heart.  I definitely feel like I need some kind of closure on the emotions from the past.

The line talks of nervousness around the health of a child, and feelings of confusion and nostalgia.  Taking the more empowering reading of these, I see the recommendation to talk about these issues, to seek wisdom on them, and so move through the confusion to a place of greater calm.  The Cross as guidance suggests that a spiritual approach - prayer and meditation - will help.

Based on this reading, I decided to do a different chant during today's meditation, and stuck to a simple Om Shanti Om, praying for inner peace.  I felt so connected to it that I ended up doing two malas of the chant, and then took some time in silence.

I have to say, it's a relief to finally be journalling about this here.  One of the reasons I've posted a lot less the last few weeks is because most of my readings spoke to me on this subject, and as I wasn't writing about it...

It weird, I flip-flop between excitement and nerves - perfect Birds behaviour.  My DH and I have started talking about it more, the last few days.  He's nervous, as well, and didn't want to talk about it when it was all so 'up in the air' (his sense of it, not mine).  Also, my mother has been away for several weeks, so I hope to get the chance to talk with her some more about it, now that she's back.  Though I don't yet want to talk about it in larger forums - I haven't posted about it on Facebook, or anywhere else on-line but this blog - I do need to work through it and let go of my fears so I can embrace this experience, untainted by the past.

4 comments:

  1. I hope that you find a helpful way to release or ease the pain of the past. It isn't easy but so important. I am trying to do that now with a different topic than you but anyway!

    Sending peace and joy,
    MM

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    1. I wish us both luck, then, MM! Past hurts cling tenaciously, but I watched something last night that talked about putting these things to rest. It's not easy, but I'm certainly going to try :)

      Sending lightheartedness and calm,
      Kxx

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  2. I like the way you read your Lenormand cards. You have a more spiritual approach then most Lenormand readers, who tend to read them for predictions

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    1. Hi Ellen,

      Thank you! I don't find predictive readings all that helpful, personally. Rachel Pollack gave a wonderful talk last year at the UK Tarot Conference about the power of prediction. There are so many issues there. If something happens after it's been predicted, how much was the situation created by the prediction? For instance, if someone is told their husband is cheating on them, they may behave in ways that drive a wedge into the relationship (distrusting, reading their texts, arguing etc), and so the husband cheats. If, instead, we focus on how we can create situations we want, that seems so much more helpful to me :)

      Please excuse the rant, this is something I've thought about a lot, especially given all the comments out there about "Lenormands are read predictively" :)

      Kx

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