Monday, 9 December 2013
Kali Sadhana Day 20
My thoughts today went to my affirmations, and how I feel these areas of my life have developed over these last 20 days.
1) I am changing my life for the better - I have chanted, meditated and practised yoga every day, which I think are good things. However, I'm not sure if I want to carry on with the daily yoga, as it takes time away from other exercise, and I like a mix of exercise. Still, I've been grateful for the renewed enthusiasm for chanting and meditating, which I do feel improves my life. I also think that fulfilling the next two affirmations, even to a small degree, changes my life for the better.
2) I am breaking free from destructive habits - My eating has been somewhat better over the course of this sadhana. Not sure if I have improved any other destructive habits.
3) I am facing my fears - Well, I don't think I've necessarily overcome any fears, but I have at least looked at and challenged some of them. For instance, I finally got my acrylic paints out. Not something I'll be doing every day, but it was good to at least make a start. I looked at some of my fears around having another baby, both in terms of how the labour/delivery will be, and in terms of how it will affect our family life and the child's life. I have also been thinking about my broom closet mentality. Haven't made any definite decisions on that one, but at least I've been looking at this fear of being seen for the pagan I am :)