release your fears" guided meditation again. This time round, when I gave my fears up to the divine, it was Brigid I saw. And she forged a staff for me, to lean on and use to defend myself. So, a shield from Kali and a staff from Brigid. I wonder if they will both accompany me for a while…
Another hypnobirthing meditation I tried is a Chakra Balancing For Expectant Mothers. There was one thing in the meditation I didn't like: they said that both the root chakra (muladhara) and sacral chakra (svaddhistana) rotate clockwise. However, in hindu philosophy the chakras rotate in alternate directions, so two chakras next to each other should rotate in opposite directions. Given they didn't state a direction for the other chakras, it seemed a bit pointless to give directions for these two, especially ones that I have heard no justification for. Although I know it's a very small point, it was enough to jar me a little, so I took longer to drop back into a deeper relaxation.
The other thing that was striking for me with that meditation was that when we came to the third chakra, the Manipura at the solar plexus, I cried. They described it as being the chakra of personal power, and looking elsewhere it is also connected to fear. Given how out of my control many things have felt and been recently, and that I'm very conscious of the fears I am trying to face, it should be no surprise that this chakra felt so unbalanced.
It was also interesting to note that the painting I did for my word of the year is predominantly orange, colour of the svaddhistana chakra, associated with the sexual system. It also has a bit of yellow (that tricky solar plexus) and rather more green, associated with the heart chakra. Definitely all lower chakra colours, and fairly appropriate to pregnancy and having another child to love :)